Ladies and gentlemen, it’s been a long couple of weeks. There’s a thought rolling around in here. I’ll try to get it to germinate and come out the way I want it to…

We don’t have to do something to support it or the people behind it. Where this is going may start with this example. A friend, Shelby, loves Halloween. I don’t. I REALLY don’t. Among other things, it makes my nightmares worse. What I do support is Shelby. She takes a huge amount of pleasure from that holiday. As another Pagan friend told me, it’s like Christmas. As a result, I have been collecting and posting a Halloween Album on FB for her. *editorial, FB is a weakness of mine. go figure* I am enjoying watching her reaction to the daily update and seeing the pictures she likes. She realizes that I am doing it for her and appreciates it. I hope this makes sense. My enjoyment is coming from the person behind something I don’t enjoy…and is giving me a reason to enjoy the holiday myself…

We are conditioned to believe that we must be in opposition to difference. “If you aren’t with us, you’re against us.”

I am not gay, yet Z is. Not only do I not oppose her, I encourage her. I want her to find companionship and love. I hope she does kiss girls. I’ll always support her and her life. I also am not Pagan. I’ve been taught that because I’m Christian, I MUST oppose my Pagan friends. The thing is, I don’t. Why should I be against the faith of some of the people that are dearest to me in the world? I want Aj, Kelly and Shelby, and the rest to enjoy and find meaning from their faith.

I watch and talk to and trust those Ladies. They, and their lives, are parts of what I count on for support in mine. I find that I need them as examples of faith and love. I see that they are unashamedly themselves. They are open with their beliefs and their lives. Those things are worth respect. Those things, the specifics, are also not my path. So what?

That’s the point I’m trying to make. Don’t look at the differences, look at the person. Don’t judge them as wrong because they do things that you do not. Look at the character and the life, see the Human living it. Different doesn’t equal wrong. It merely equals a perspective that is not your own.

I’m going to cheat, here. I’ll quote a FB status I wrote the other day and end…

“I have friends that are gay. I love and treasure them. I have friends that are Pagan. I love and treasure them. I am neither and, yet, they love and treasure me. Getting along with people that are “differently normal” lets us find people we love and treasure. Who doesn’t need more of both?”

Thoughts on Political Parties and Organized Religion…

I despise political parties. I’m not a huge fan of “organized religion” or TV evangelists. The reasoning behind that set of generalizations is that they remove our need to think for ourselves. We have “dumbed down” our thought processes to the point that all we have to know is, “They told me I should be against (fill in the blank)”. Now to digress and explain…

I am a Christian. Period. I can not see a time when I will not be. I have read the Bible, more than twice, cover to cover. I have worn out a couple and written/highlighted one of those to “unreadable”…and yet, I AM capable of making my own mind up about its contents and societal implications. I am able to look at its historical context and, in light of 2000 years of change, the place it should fit now. I also am able to realize that Jesus said and acted one way and the actions and words of Paul are NOT those of Jesus. On the Damascus Road, Jesus asked Paul, then Saul, “Why are you persecuting me?” Paul merely switched the object of his anger and persecutions. *editorial, you are allowed to disagree with me if you wish but, looking at his behavior, Paul relished his anger. He was not a nice person* Jesus spoke of love, introspection, and inclusion. Paul did not. So…*next digression…*

I came to my own conclusions. I decided that “hate the sin, love the sinner” was not written down in that book. I also realize that we are not called to say, “they are going to Hell” unless we wish to be condemned to Hell ourselves. Yeah, Jesus did say that.

I find that the entire bit about women and LBGT’s only fit in the historical context of infant mortality and a society that NEEDED to reproduce in order to survive. That a male dominated society only fit during a period that needed fewer men and more women because death during child birth means that more women had to breed *sorry to be blunt* and that it only took one man to impregnate multiple women, so, the bottleneck was women, not men. Also, men had a tendency to die more often due to the violence of the times. Those conditions no longer apply. 7 billion people mean that population is no longer a survival need. Big families, in order to produce food, are not needed. In modern society those things do not apply. Jesus never spoke to them, only Paul and, again, he’s not Jesus.

In light of the call not to judge someone’s soul, I don’t. I can not. It is that easy…

Political parties, politicians, and those that presume to tell us what we should believe pander to our fears and refusal to think. They presume that we believe that we MUST be against those that are not like us and feed on and promote xenophobia. They take away our ability to cooperate. They HAVE to. If they don’t, they are unemployed. It is a popularity contest. The preacher in his on his pulpit tells you that everyone that is not like you is out to get you. The politician tells you the same. Both want your money. Both want to keep their jobs. The only way they can is to feed your fear.

I have close friends, in fact my closest friends, that do not share my gender. Yeppers, they’re women. I should, according to Paul, not treat them as equals. If you knew them, you’d find that I would be missing out on their strengths and their friendship. My wife is my partner, not my subordinate. Two of those women are Lesbians. So what, I married a woman, I agree with their decision to love women. Again, within that group of three, two are not Christian, they’re Witches, Pagan Witches. So what? My faith calls me to show and example and live my life in a manner that is worthy of MY faith, not to judge their souls, “For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” I DO NOT want the judgment I’ve earned. I want mercy. Again, within that group of three, the one that is not a witch is a Lesbian and does share Christianity with me. Yes, I believe it is possible to be both Christian and LBGT. If the argument against is is “Z is a sinner” then NONE of us may be Christian. All Christians sin, EVERYONE OF US does. It is, within the context of Christianity, impossible not to. If the argument against Kelly or Aj is “she’s a sinner” the reply is, “she’s Pagan and the concept of sin does not apply to her beliefs”.

Different does not equal evil or wrong. It is merely different. *editorial, I know this post is very similar to other posts. I don’t really care. It needs to be said over and over* When we allow a political party to dictate our beliefs, we fall in to the trap of giving away the independence that we, Americans, so prize. When we let ourselves be lured in by the idea that we alone are special, we discount the value and worth of others. When we listen to the loudest or most charismatic person that we hear, when we let flash dictate our thoughts, we lose the sight of what truly matters.

Substance is not flash. It isn’t shiny. It has “bottom” and depth. It is the result of thought, meditation, soul-searching, and work. It is the result of our own effort. It does not come with thoughts implanted by others. During the  months leading to that popularity contest next year, please think. Look at the ones that don’t merely pander to divisiveness but, are inclusive. Look away from party and to character. Look for wisdom and insight. Search out actions and not words. Then decide. Make your choices based on what you think and not what you are told to think.

That’s it. It is not too much to ask. *sigh*

Hurray for Our Side

I can’t find anything to write…and that’s a good thing. Today is the day I normally write a post because it’s my “weekend” but, other than the usual “politicians are making noise because it’s the election season and they are pandering to the lowest common denominator”, there’s nothing glaring to write about. So…maybe I’ll just tap away and see what happens…

I love my wife. That’s by far the most important thing in my life, my love for her.

Aj, Z, and Kelladillo are still the Collective Conscience. That, too, is easy to figure out. *editorial, there’s a “silent partner” that watches but, never says anything. No, Leanna, you’re not forgotten*

Pagans are not evil. Nor are Wiccans. Witches are not, too, either. They’re just not Christian. So what, I’m not Pagan, Wiccan, or a Witch. Doesn’t keep me from loving them and treasuring their souls.

Being LBGT does not disqualify you from being a Christian. It just disqualifies you from going to some churches that teach that it does disqualify you.

Having friends that are not exactly like you is a blessing. Meaning, as a straight Christian, having friends that aren’t straight, Christian or both has broadened my perspective. They accept me, even though most of “my demographic” might find some moral exception to one or the other of the things that don’t line up with straight or Christian. Oh well. I think they’re great. Wouldn’t change them if I could because then they would be different and I might not like or love them.

Anyway, this was just a “Hurray for Our Side” post. Aj, Z, Kelladillo…and yes, you too, Leanna, I love you all to bits. Thanks for loving me back.

The Walls That Harm Us…

I have lived Paranoid. For many years, I used meth. If you have never been awake for a couple of days trying to do enough meth to stay awake for more, you really have no clue how bad that can be. I have been terrified hiding inside my house. All the windows blocked. Jumping at every noise. Afraid that someone will want in. Scared to leave. Crawling around so that you can stay beow the chance of someone seeing in. Peering out through the tiniest crack looking for “Them”…I hid inside the walls, not realizing I created them and not wanting out because outside was Danger…The danger was me…The danger was the Walls…

I like on-line friendships. They still allow distance. My closest friends are on-line. There’s nothing wrong with that. My job forces interaction. I can not hide from it. On the other hand, home is a refuge. It is cool, dark, and quiet. My wife and my life are here…and my friends. People do not physically visit and that’s fine. *editorial, our house is small and there’s not much sitting room. That’s why*

I am no longer Paranoid. It’s been almost ten years since I last used. I can not imagine going back. The cost would be far too high. The price would be everything…

Anyway, the Walls…My best friend is Pagan. I am not. During the time we were starting to develop the mutual respect that led to realizing we were best friends, I had no idea she was Pagan. My world view, after I became sober, was concentrated around Conservative Christianity, and all its baggage…The day I found out, all that baggage came to roost. All the fears of Divination, Sorcery, and visions of Hell came home. I was hit with a HUGE problem. I thought I knew Aj. I knew she was “saved” because I knew her honor, honesty, character, and love. I was given a choice, tear down the Walls my learning had built or consign her to Hell and, by doing that, reject her. Like I say, present tense, “my best friend IS Pagan”. Those Walls that I thought protected me would have walled her out. They would have cost me someone that constantly if a bit testily *grins*, wants the best for my wife and me. I would have rejected one of the people that I, now, love as much as any of my blood family. That “protection” would have harmed me…and, I think, her since she would have lost the love and prayers I send to her. *editorial, my prayers are NOT for her to change but for my God to watch over and protect her*

The Walls…we think they protect us. We think that by excluding people we make ourselves safe. Nothing could be more untrue. Hiding below the windows denies the World. It only lets us see our fears. It creates Paranoid. The only things inside the Walls with us are our own Monsters.

It isn’t the outside we have to fear. It’s the inside. It’s the loneliness and xenophobia that says, “different is wrong” not realizing that EVERYONE is different…


For what it’s worth and to clarify, Aj’s beliefs do not include the concept of “Christian Hell”. Mine do. Either was, I do not think that her soul is going there. I’m not a “universalist” by any reach. I just don’t think that Hell applies to people not of my faith. I believe that God is big enough and powerful enough to have made a place for all His Creations…for that matter *grins* Aj would even dispute that part of my beliefs because she believes differently…*grins again*…

Why I Write About Z

Right after I started writing these, Z and I were talking. We decided to “throw her under the bus”. The point was that we needed a real person to be the “token” Lesbian. She volunteered. With only a few exceptions, she has been that person. The degrading comments that I’ve quoted have been directed at her. Either I’ve seen them or she’s related them to me…

She’s unashamedly a Lesbian. She doesn’t really hide it but, she doesn’t “advertise” either…unless you know her. On the other hand, she’ll get confrontational in an instant if someone starts talking about “those people” or any other way it happens to be phrased. To her, and me, being gay is a neutral expression. It’s like saying she has curly hair. It is just a part of her. It, by itself, doesn’t make her either good or bad. It merely makes her gay…and that’s it…

I keep thinking the entire issue will just go away. I suppose it’s wishful thinking. I keep hoping that the haters will be as marginalized as the KKK, loud but, irrelevant…then some group decided they’re offended by the fact that Z wants to be treated “just like a real person” and that her existence is “against my religion”…and the issue comes back…


My personal theology says that I believe in an omnipotent and omniscient God. I believe that the concept of “free will” is an illusion. I believe, although I don’t know why, that all things and all people are the way they are intended to be. I am finally at a point where “why?” is a question I no longer ask. I suppose that sounds fatalistic. That I have resigned myself to not acting because it doesn’t matter what I or anyone else does. I digress, as part of my beliefs, I believe we were created the way God intended for us to be. Yes, that includes male, female, LBGT, straight, Christian, Pagan, atheist, and every other faith or sect. *editorial, yes, I have listed “atheist” as a faith. Deal with it.* I do not think God created mistakes. I think yes, to be very specific, that Z is exactly the way she was intended to be just as I am the way I’m supposed to be. It makes no difference that she was created, among other things, to be a lesbian and I was created to be straight.

I am sure I “cherry pick” the Bible. I stick to the words of Jesus as the final arbiter and the OT as history. The books that come after, ie the NT, are commentary and opinion. Those, the “not Gospels” were written by men who had no personal knowledge of Jesus and have been added to and subtracted from in the various cannons over the centuries.

It is also an article of my beliefs that I DO NOT get to decide who goes to Heaven or Hell. I don’t get to say that my soul is saved and some other is condemned. I don’t even get to guess. That isn’t my place. Mine is to be concerned with mine and my Earthly actions. I am required to treat Gods Creations as if they have value and worth. If I am supposed to share my faith or attempt to “convert” it’s by the way I live MY life, not by judging someone else’s.

There is also a part of me that recognizes my humanity. I make mistakes. I can be deliberatly offensive. I intentionally do things that cause emotional stress to others. I’m far from perfect. I do not pretend that my views or faith have been unchanged over the years. I am capable of being a hypocrite. I have loves…and hates.


In the end, I’ll embrace being a Heretic. I’ll keep my views that being gay is as valid as being straight. I’ll continue to believe that I do not have all the answers about the Face of God. *Editorial, yes, that means that I may read the Bible and find it to be valid for me, I’ll not impose it on someone else* I’ll maintain the belief that being a Humanist and a Christian are not mutually exclusive.


This post is a result of the furor over that person in Kentucky. My mistake is not that I write her off as someone I disagree with but, that I read the comments of her vocal supporters. I read Hateful Christians that claim that being gay is a choice. That, somehow, they have a right to call Z, although not directly, “deviant” or “mistake” or “abomination”. I read those thoughts and wonder if they and I believe in the same God. I find myself trying to figure out how they got from “omnipotent” to “mistake”. I don’t really want to know.


This started out as a “Hurray for Z” article. It didn’t get there the way I expected. It still is, though. I love having Z in my world. I love the reassurance of her prayers for me. I sleep better knowing that, even if I forget, she remembers to watch out for me. That whole “Lesbian thing”? That is as immaterial to me as her hair being curly. Her person, the whole construct, is greater than any single part…funny thing is, EVERY human is that way. There may be a part of them we might want to change but, if we do, we change the WHOLE. I want her to stay just they way she is. That person, Z, has worth. That person is a place in my world that can be filled by no other and I wouldn’t change that if I could. That person is not a label or a demographic or a choice. That person, Z, is a gift that God gave to me…

Pull Your Pants Down and Other Random Bits…

I have an experiment…pull your pants down. Do you have “parts”? Good. We have established that you have them. Now, go up to a stranger. Attempt to pull their pants down. Did you get slapped? Good, now we have figured out that their “parts” are none of your d**n business…There is a point to this…Take it further, look at your parts in public. Take a long look and maybe play with them. Did you get some funny looks and maybe a “conversation” with a cop? The reason is that there are boundaries to what we think is permissible conduct. What is socially acceptable and what is not. What you do in private with your privates *pun intended* is your business and that of those you share them with. What you do with them in public is the business of those that do not want to see or touch them…

Religion is the same way. It is acceptable to have it. It is acceptable to recognize that others have theirs. It is NOT ok to inflict yours on someone else without their permission. *editorial, yes, I really did just compare genitals to religion* If you are in a place where people have chosen to find you, sharing and discussing faith or religion is your option because they have a chance to leave or rebut. When you force your views on someone that has no choice, there is no difference between that and any other emotional coercion.


Hey Z, you said, yesterday, that you told some people “I’m one of those fags”. I looked it up. It took a bunch of googling to find a definition that finally gave me this “Faggot, often shortened to fag, is a pejorative term used chiefly in North America primarily to refer to a gay man” *from the wiki* I think the term you were looking for is “Human” just like those “fags” are humans, too. Funny, not ha ha, how that works. I think the people that don’t see the Human have been spending too much time looking in someone else’s pants…


I was just talking to my wife and had this deep *grins…maybe not* thought. Cows follow a$$holes that randomly spew s**t on the path and don’t seem to mind. People are the same way. We get used to following the same kinds of thing and don’t even notice what we are walking in. Cows also follow the same path every day. Go look in a pasture if you don’t believe me. Anyway, if you follow someone because it’s what you’re used to, you get used to not thinking and walking in manure. There are other paths and other ways to get to the same end. Try thinking on your own. We may still end up agreeing but, at least we can share different views of the journey…


As an aside, I posted links to Aj and Kelly’s blogs in the Why Am I Here bit. I offered to remove their links. They left them there. I was talking to Z and told her that HER blog link could not be removed. *grins* There’s a very simple reason for that. I write these words. She is in every post. Sometimes I quote her. Sometimes it’s a conversation that starts the train of thought that ends here. Sometimes, it’s an article disparaging Lesbians or LBGT’s that does it. Sometimes, nothing…except that she was the one of the person’s that encouraged me to start. So, it may be me but, to remove her blog link would mean not writing and that’s not an option…


I think that’s enough for this morning. Let me make sure. Inappropriate joke, check. Religious freedom, check. More oddness involving animals and human behavior, check. Z being human, check. Aj and Kelly, check…Wait…missed something…Hey Z, kiss girls, play with boobies, go have fun… *grins* …got it now. Comment encouraging favorite Lesbian to do “stuff”, check. Now, I’m done…

Y’all have a good Monday. Try not to take yourselves too seriously. Hug someone you love. Breathe and relax, life’s far too short for hate.

The Voices of the Enemy

I decided to let the Collective Conscience speak…

Aj said this, “I took the actual Kinsey Scale test and was 0 percent homosexual. 100 percent heterosexual. With that being said, just because my personal preference is not the same sex does not mean I see anything wrong with same-sex couples or people who prefer same-sex partners. I think people are people and EVERYONE should be with exactly who they are meant to be with regardless of race or gender!” Interestingly enough, I did, too. If you read these, you know I think exactly the same way…and now you know some of why I love Aj…

Z said this, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal…..equal, not identical. Wrap your head around that. Declare your independence from your mind’s constraints.” If you read these, you know that I think that way, too…and now you know some of why I love Z…

Kelly said this, “We can accept people just as they are, we can love them, just as they are, we can offer our hands no matter who they are. If someone comes out to you, as gay, lesbian, transgender, bisexual, Pagan, Witch, Muslim, Christian, or oompaloompa THINK about THEM. This isn’t about YOU, it is about THEM. You can take time to yourself to decide how you feel, what you think, and how you’re going to move forward, but this step takes so much courage, and so much strength to take. Stop, think, think some more, then react. Initial reactions aren’t always what you want to say in this situation, it’s also not what you’re going to feel tomorrow or a week from now.” If you read these, you know I share those views…and now you know some of why I love Kelly…

These are the voices of the “enemy”. Two are Pagan. Two are Lesbian. One is straight. One is Christian. One Pagan is straight. One Christian is Lesbian. One is both Pagan and Lesbian. By all rights, they should have no reason to be accepting of me. Yet, they are the Collective Conscience. They are the reasons I am as passionate about writing this blog as I am.

Read the words that are inside of them, then look at Kim Davis and Mike Huckabee and all the cheerleader haters and decide who you would rather side with? Would you choose the ones that have distorted a message of love, the words of Jesus, or the ones that do not march in lockstep with you and, yet, will love you despite your differences?


Bouncing in My Head, A VERY Disjointed Post

Bouncing around in my head stuff…

I know the words “I can’t write too many like this” sound weak but, when I wrote my last one,  https://millerdavidge.wordpress.com/2015/09/01/we-created-this-and-we-have-to-fix-it/, I had to really face what had been done to some of the people I love. They, specifically, were in it. Yeah, they told me the events were years ago. To me, since I just found out, they happened yesterday. So, please forgive me if I don’t write about abuse rape or the general treatment of women as objects as often as I think those topics are needed. To imagine people deliberately harming people I love, hurts.

By the same token, The Muse, the original muse, Z is a lesbian…well, that’s far from all she is but, in the original context of this blog, that distinction matters. She, too, is not an object. She is a person. A warm, caring, Christian person. She is not a political tool…but, “Z-posts” are easier. All I have to do is get angry or frustrated…and yeah, sometimes, sad, too. Because, you see, Z also fits the group up there. Any post that includes treating humans like humans includes Z…and you…and me…

Anyway, on a sort of related note. Kim Davis…is not a hero. She is an elected official. She agreed to follow the Constitution. Yes, that means the rulings of the SCOTUS. If she feels that, she can not do her job, ALL of her job, she should resign. She does not get to pick what laws to follow. Yes, I know that some people will troll and make responses that the original ruling in Obergefell was un-Constitutional but, that is not a correct view. It is equal protection. Loving v Virginia, among others affirmed marriage as a fundamental right. You don’t get to vote those away. You don’t get to cite “strongly held religious beliefs” as a reason for denying those…and yeah, spare me the Obama and Bush ignored laws comments. Just because you think someone else is wrong doesn’t make a third party right…

So, just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water, Kim did achieve one of my goals, Westboro Baptist is protesting her. I’m jealous…

Anyway, I’ve also been informed that my theology either Heretic Christian or Christian Humanist aren’t really Christian. I think I missed something. I thought “love your neighbor” was Christian. I thought “let he who is without sin cast the first stone” was also Christian. I thought “remove the log from your own eye…” was an entirely Christian concept. That whole “love the sinner, hate the sin” isn’t even in the Bible…and besides, my heresy includes not thinking that being the way God created you is a sin, meaning, specifically, being LBGT is no more a sin than being straight. That being a woman is no less than being a man. That kindness and love are the central messages of Jesus words, not hate and exclusion…so please don’t tell me I can not be a Christian for having my views when you would say “Jesus Hates Fags”…I’ll tell you the truth, from my perspective, I believe he’d love Pagans, Lesbians. Pagan Lesbians, and every other Human on the planet…all of those are people I love…

Anyway, I’ll make that an end for today. It’s been a long week. My head hurts. I’ll have some, I hope, more gathered thoughts tomorrow, my other day off. Thanks for reading this far.

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We Created This and We Have to Fix It

miller davidge iii:

I know this is the last post I wrote. I also know that it has helped. I wish more men would read it. *sigh*

Originally posted on Stones in the Middle of the Jordan:


This is what we have done. My faith, Christianity, says that women are second class. My “programming” says that they are there to keep the home…and by extension, be mothers first and women second. Western Culture is finally breaking out of the Puritan view that women are sexually depraved and morally weak. We allow ourselves, men, to believe that we are “owed” whatever we want from women because they are incapable of doing anything without a man. We are taught, from an early age, that some things are “women’s work”. We have created a stereotype that makes them only menials.


Kipling wrote this in “The Female of the Species” and this is what WE fear…

“When the Himalayan peasant meets the he-bear in his pride,
He shouts to scare the monster, who will often turn aside.
But the she-bear thus accosted rends the peasant tooth and nail.

View original 1,067 more words


We Created This and We Have to Fix It


This is what we have done. My faith, Christianity, says that women are second class. My “programming” says that they are there to keep the home…and by extension, be mothers first and women second. Western Culture is finally breaking out of the Puritan view that women are sexually depraved and morally weak. We allow ourselves, men, to believe that we are “owed” whatever we want from women because they are incapable of doing anything without a man. We are taught, from an early age, that some things are “women’s work”. We have created a stereotype that makes them only menials.


Kipling wrote this in “The Female of the Species” and this is what WE fear…

“When the Himalayan peasant meets the he-bear in his pride,
He shouts to scare the monster, who will often turn aside.
But the she-bear thus accosted rends the peasant tooth and nail.
For the female of the species is more deadly than the male.

When Nag the basking cobra hears the careless foot of man,
He will sometimes wriggle sideways and avoid it if he can.
But his mate makes no such motion where she camps beside the trail.
For the female of the species is more deadly than the male.

When the early Jesuit fathers preached to Hurons and Choctaws,
They prayed to be delivered from the vengeance of the squaws.
‘Twas the women, not the warriors, turned those stark enthusiasts pale.
For the female of the species is more deadly than the male.

Man’s timid heart is bursting with the things he must not say,
For the Woman that God gave him isn’t his to give away;
But when hunter meets with husband, each confirms the other’s tale,
The female of the species is more deadly than the male.

Man, a bear in most relations-worm and savage otherwise,,
Man propounds negotiations, Man accepts the compromise.
Very rarely will he squarely push the logic of a fact
To its ultimate conclusion in unmitigated act.

Fear, or foolishness, impels him, ere he lay the wicked low,
To concede some form of trial even to his fiercest foe.
Mirth obscene diverts his anger,- Doubt and Pity oft perplex
Him in dealing with an issue, to the scandal of The Sex!

But the Woman that God gave him, every fibre of her frame
Proves her launched for one sole issue, armed and engined for the same;
And to serve that single issue, lest the generations fail,
The female of the species must be deadlier than the male.

She who faces Death by torture for each life beneath her breast
May not deal in doubt or pity, must not swerve for fact or jest.
These be purely male diversions, not in these her honour dwells.
She the Other Law we live by, is that Law and nothing else.

She can bring no more to living than the powers that make her great
As the Mother of the Infant and the Mistress of the Mate.
And when Babe and Man are lacking and she strides unclaimed to claim
Her right as femme (and baron), her equipment is the same.

She is wedded to convictions, in default of grosser ties;
Her contentions are her children, Heaven help him who denies!,
He will meet no suave discussion, but the instant, white-hot, wild,
Wakened female of the species warring as for spouse and child.

Unprovoked and awful charges, even so the she-bear fights,
Speech that drips, corrodes, and poisons, even so the cobra bites,
Scientific vivisection of one nerve till it is raw
And the victim writhes in anguish, like the Jesuit with the squaw!

So it cames that Man, the coward, when he gathers to confer
With his fellow-braves in council, dare not leave a place for her
Where, at war with Life and Conscience, he uplifts his erring hands
To some God of Abstract Justice, which no woman understands.

And Man knows it! Knows, moreover, that the Woman that God gave him
Must command but may not govern, shall enthral but not enslave him.
And She knows, because She warns him, and Her instincts never fail,
That the Female of Her Species is more deadly than the Male.”

*Yes, this is a 19th Century sexist view. It is gender divided along strict biological roles.*

We know this to be true…and it terrifies us. We HAVE to exert power or we have to admit weakness. That is the perception.


That quiet girl in the corner at the party, her boyfriend raped her and no one believes it. He’s a nice guy… The one that’s very loudly drunk, her father abuses her and her mom blames her… The girl that was walking home from work because her car broke just got blamed for wearing shorts and a halter top in 105-degree heat. The cops told her she was asking for it…The college student that passed out at a frat party should have expected it…The one you just ogled, she dressed for herself and NOT you…The girl that has a string of abusive relationships, the first was her father and, now, that’s all she thinks she deserves…The one you just called a b**ch, she doesn’t trust anyone because she can’t. Everyone she did trust told her he loved her and betrayed her. You were staring and the only way she feels safe is to push you away…The older lady with the bad attitude in the grocery store, her husband has been an abusive drunk for 40 years…

The random indignities, the disrespect that men don’t see, the verbal abuse we think is flattery, the casual disregard, the turning to stare, the whistles and comments, we don’t even realize we’re doing them and women have to put up with them. We think it’s normal. We think those are compliments. We think they’re our right…yet, if we had to deal with it, we could not.

Women didn’t invite this. They for damn sure don’t deserve it. No one does.


Guys, men, we created this. We are the cause and the solution. We have made the world so that we are not trusted. We have told women that they are second class, that they are servants, property, sexual objects, stupid, and only good for bearing children. Every right they have, they had to fight for. They had to fight to be able to vote. They had to fight to be able to decide when to and not to have sex. They had to win the right to choose contraception. Now, we have the nerve to blame them for not trusting us to act in their best interests when we have proven time and again that we will not…

The answer it not to “allow” them to have rights.It is to, finally, shut up. They well and truly earned their space and rights. If men had to put up with the s**t that women have had to, this would be long over. It is not “giving up” power, it’s sharing it with the other half of Humanity…Women shouldn’t have to fight to get what is theirs. We, men, have to finally get over ourselves. We, Humanity, can be greater than what we are when half of humanity doesn’t fear the other half…and, yeah, I mean both halves fearing the other…