Sometimes, I can’t sleep. Since, most nights, I wake up a few times I think. Last night I was thinking again. I had some good stuff going. Then, I woke up and it kind of went away. I’m going to try to get it out. I hope this makes sense…
If you’ve read this blog, you know I have a friend named Z. *that’s what i call her. it’s short for “Zippy”, her nickname* If you read far enough back, you’ll find that I started this to stand up for her rights. The tool I’ve tried to use is putting a face on the issue of “equal protection under the law”. I’m going to try again.
*I like my world to be nice and ordered. It simplifies things for me to have a category for people. My wife has her’s. Aj is the “best friend” category. Problem is Z. You see, she doesn’t fit either of those, yet, she’s in her own group. It confuses me. She’s a confidant, a person i go to for prayer, the “love her to pieces” person and someone I want to protect. I’m thinking that there is going to have to be room in the “best friend” category. Hope Aj doesn’t mind. I digress*
Anyway, let me paint, I hope, a picture. Z is an itty bitty lady. She’s about this tall, I think. *holds out hand* She acts like she’s about this tall. *lifts hand above head* She’s a used-to-be soldier. She’s smarter than I am and I’m pretty sharp. *grins* She’s more than capable of doing anything she sets her mind to. She’s a good mom. She cares deeply for social issues. She works, last I knew, 3 jobs. She’s stubborn, opinionated, and smartass. She loves music and reading. She likes to camp and go fishing. She is a runner. She’s Christian. She’s a good friend. She’s someone I trust. She’s one of the people that I treasure. She’s Z. She’s unique. Sure, she’s not perfect but, so what? None of us are perfect.
Yet, to some people, they can not focus on the person she is. All they see is one part, that she happens not to be straight. Hunh? When you look at the gestalt, you see one part and decide, based on that, that she should be marginalized? You don’t see the Army Reservist that went to Iraq? You don’t see the good mom? You don’t see the smartass I know and love? You see one tiny bit and think “shes different”. Yeah, she is. Talk to her and find out that her mind is different than yours. For that matter, talk to anyone and find out that their mind is different than yours. It’s the way the world works.
This is what I want you to do. I want you to look at Z and tell her, to her face, “you do not deserve the same legal protections I have”. I want you to tell my friend “you are less than human, in my eyes”. Do you have the “stones” to do that? If you do, nothing I will ever be able to say will ever change your views. Nothing can fix that. I would submit, however, that the same logic has been used before, in Germany…
Please, before you ever decide a group is less than human, look at the humans that make up that group. Please realize that to love and be loved is human. Please, see my friend as what she is, a treasured human and not an object. Please don’t fear her, hate her or marginalize her. Please don’t decide her life makes your life worse. It doesn’t. Her life is my gain because she allowed me into hers. For what it’s worth, I’d rather have a friend like Z than a thousand of the ones that hate her. If my choice is to stand beside Z and speak for her or keep silent, I’ll always be a voice for her. She deserves it.