I Had a Thought and Changed My Mind

I was going to go on a rant about my pet peeve. It’s the victim mentality. I really don’t like the attitude in myself, or anyone else, that is not willing to take the blame for our own actions.

It’s been brewing because of that idiot out in Cali that wanted to blame women for his own misguided actions. It also brews because I see my demographic wanting to say the world is against us. We seem to think that we get to blame other people for us deciding to be a$$holes. We don’t.

Somehow, we have decided that placing responsibility for our actions on others is comfortable. I do not understand that. I find it much easier to realize that I’m a big boy and I have some control over myself. I may not be able to change the way other people perceive me but, I can control the way I react. Anyway, that was the thought I had and was going to expand on. Changed my mind.

Then…I “un-changed” it.

I think it becomes a matter of perception vs fact. The perception is that the “gay agenda” will be the downfall of the “straight agenda”. That is not the truth. By knowing Z, I am not going to have my marriage ruined, become gay, and decide to take a male lover. It isn’t going to happen. If it were, it would have happened by now. I’ve known Z for years. What did happen was that I became outspoken in defending her. That’s it. That and I made a trusted friend.

The perception is that by allowing Z into your church, she will cause the “corruption” of your church. If by “corruption” you mean gaining a member of your church that believes very strongly, takes the injunction “do unto others…” to heart, and loves God, then, yeah, she’s going to “corrupt” it. What will cause it to fail is when you forget that Jesus loved everyone. That the Gospel is about letting anyone that wants to hear it in.

I guess I’m a “simple”, using the meaning “clueless”, person. I don’t see how someone being what they are makes me a “victim” of them. I don’t see how I get to blame my actions on her. Perhaps she brainwashed me? Perhaps I’ve been contaminated by associating with her? Somehow, by asking her to pray for me, when I need it, I’ve been tainted? Maybe she has ruined my orthodoxy because I think that being gay has nothing to do with being a good Christian Lady? Is that it? Am I a victim of her “agenda”?

In all reality, the answer to all of the questions is “no”. I am not a victim of Z. I am a willing participant. I have looked at the facts and come to the conclusion that I would rather speak up for her, when she lets me. I would rather go to her for prayer than to a “Christian” that would call her “perversion” and shove her out of their church. If I am “tainted” by the idea that being gay does not make you less than equal to a straight person, so be it. I have not been brainwashed into seeing her as any more or less than she is. I have not been victimized by an “agenda” that merely wants to be treated as an equal.

That is where I am going with this. We only become victims when someone inflicts on us an action that we can not avoid and has a physical or material cost. The conscious choices we make to feel sorry for ourselves or affix blame on others do not make us victims. Those choices make us whiners.

For what it’s worth, in parting, I think the downfall of Christianity is un-Christian Christians.

 

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One comment

  1. I myself have gay friends. They know I am Christian. Do I mention my point of view? No. Because they already know it
    Each person as you stated above is responsible for their own behavior. I have my own sins to overcome and deal with. if they ask my opinion on something. They get.
    One time I was asked what I have the most problem with those in the gay community. I said their selfishness. There have been too many instances in my life where I have witnessed this behavior.
    As a Christian I have learned to not think of myself but to think of other. I Feel once someone places themsleves last they can grow.
    I Also agree that people need to take responsibility for their actions

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