A Grumpy Post About Love and Marriage

I was talking about “love” yesterday. If you knew me, out here, this would strike you as a bit “odd”. I can be a grumpy person. I am not always but, sometimes. Any way, I think I’ll re-visit the subject again. This time, we’re back into “protest mode”.

On a rational level, my objection to “marriage inequality” boils down to a 14th Amendment objection. Does “equal protection” apply evenly or not.

On a personal and emotional level, it becomes more complicated. I can try to simplify. I was able to find and fall in love with my wife. I was able to say publicly that I was making a legally binding profession of my love. I was told that, because we are hetero, our love had value beyond that of our personal commitment. Had we been gay, that, in most states, would not have been the case.

I think that’s what bugs me. Who are we, as a society, to tell Z that her love, and her capacity for it, has less value than our own? Who are we to judge the condition of her heart? At what point does our arrogance become so great that we take that most human of emotions and deem it of lessor worth in an other human? Don’t we realize that by putting a limit on the commitment that we allow her to be able to make, we have decided that she is less than human? Very little really angers me any more.  This does. The entire lack of regard and the selfishness we exhibit brings out my ugly side. It makes me ashamed to realize that I, by my inaction, could have been a party to that.

I don’t honestly know if Z will ever get married. I don’t know that she wants to. I do know that, if she does, her future wife will win the “prize” *editorial, she is NOT an object. it is merely a figure of speech* What I want to do my best to do, and insure, is that she is given the chance. Love is not necessarily defined by marriage. Commitment doesn’t have to have a ceremony to prove it. Again, if she is ever willing to, I don’t want it to be denied to her. I don’t think that’s too much to ask.

*Editorial, I told y’all I could be a bit “grumpy”. Today, I was*


  1. I’m a bit grumpy myself. My wife calls it hormonal imbalance. I think it’s stress or benadryl side effect. I agree, no human should have the right what proper love is. First, it is inhuman to deprive someone of their happiness. Second, it’s violation of another’s freedom to love and to choose whom to love. If people go crazy when their freedom of speech is violated how much more when one’s right to love is taken away? Thanks for expressing what you believe in.

    1. I don’t think that I deserve thanks. I do appreciate your words, though. Yes, I entirely agree with your points. As an editorial, I committed to saying something, everyday, in support of “equal protection under the law”.As a result, because the workplace is not always the correct venue, I make a blog post or, my Facebook page. It might get a “bit” old reading all of the ways I try to use to figure out the words to say. Thank you for reading them, though.

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