The “best” part about having a lesbian as a close friend is…
That’s what I was going to write. Then I was going to list some reasons. Some were to be funny. Other’s were to be serious. Then I was going to comment about how Z was more than just a label.
Calling Z a Lesbian and sticking with that as a label does her no justice. Calling my “adopted daughter”, Cassie, a lesbian and sticking with that does the same. Labels suck.
I didn’t become friends with Z because of the label. I didn’t decide I wanted to adopt Cassie because of the gender she loves. In fact, I became attached to them before I ever found out. Point of fact, I don’t care who they have sex with as long as that person is worth them. Neither is a “floozy”. Both are people with depth and value. If they weren’t, I’d not have had anything to do with them.
Context is the key. I write for them because of WHO they are and not what. Without the context of the blog, it wouldn’t cross my mind at all…except when I send “best wishes” to their girlfriends. When Cassie comes to visit me at work, I don’t tell customers “that’s my gay daughter”. I just think how lucky I am to get a visit. When I call Z, the subject doesn’t come up at all except to ask how her g.f. is doing.
My friend is a human. She is far more than just a label. My “daughter” is a warm, caring, young human that happens to be a lesbian. I couldn’t be prouder of either one of them.
The best part of having a lesbian as a friend is that they let me be their friend. I will as long as they will have me. I’ll count myself as the one who has gained from them. I’m a lucky guy.