Being Gay and Faith

I read a blog yesterday. It was written by a young lady that was trying to find a church for her, her wife, and their kids. All she wanted was a church home so that her kids could feel the warmth and love that she and her wife knew as kids. That is not too much to ask.

What got to me even more were the comments and responses to her blog. I read people telling her that she was a sinner. That she should not be allowed to participate in church leadership and activities because of her “choice”.  She had churches suggested to her that would help her to “change”.

I suppose I just don’t get it. I am a person that has spent more of his life as an addict than I haven’t. I could go to church and participate in “activities” as long as I was not actively high. I could be embraced by my church and be allowed to be a member and treated with sympathy. Hunh? They KNEW I was an addict. By definition, addicts commit criminal acts. We break the law constantly. We drive “impaired”. We use illegal and legal drugs. We made a choice to do what we do. Those are acts of volition. We decided it was a proper course of action to continue to abuse the law and ourselves. Addicts, to me, are incapable of loving anyone except themselves.

Addicts, to me, are incapable of loving anyone except themselves. That sentence, too, is a lie. The majority of us don’t even love ourselves. Yet, my church, knowing this would still have me as a member and not someone that was LBGT.

Being stigmatized for loving the person you were created to love makes no sense to me. Being LBGT is NOT a “choice” any more than being straight is. *editorial, I know there are people that are going to disagree with me on this one* I read people quoting the Old Testament Law that, in their minds, makes it ok to discriminate against the LBGT community. They cite all the legalistic bulls**t they can find. They look for any excuse to exclude. They say that God didn’t create “those people” that way. Here’s the funny, not ha ha, thing. The Bible speaks far more to a lack of choice. It says, over and over, that God knew you and what you were to be before you were born. It says that we are created in His Image. It never has the concept of “free will”. Nope, I looked, that idea is not in there.

The Bible speaks of love for our neighbors. In the New Testament, it speaks of changing the old laws to a new one “love your neighbor”. It teaches us to not judge someone by a standard we do not want used against us. We are taught to seek out the oppressed and protect them. We are challenged to speak of love to everyone that we meet. We are given the task of helping those in distress.

Churches use the excuse, “we don’t want to be seen condoning that behavior in our church. We don’t want people to think we let sinners in here.” Breaking the law is a sin. Paul says it in Romans. He says governments are put in place by God. That their rules should be given the same weight as Gods laws. So, does that mean that anyone that breaks the speed limit is excluded. Having a radar detector is specifically designed to make it possible to have no consequence to repeated illegal acts. Do we exclude those parents that have given a sip of their beer or wine to their minor child? Do we exclude the adults that, when they were underage teens, had sex with their underage partners? Where do  we draw the line? If we are to follow the set of rules that those misguided legalistic types would have us use, there would be no one in any church on Sunday.

I finally came down to this. I decided to become Heretic. I list my faith as Heretic Christian. There is only one member in my church, me. I have a fine Christian Lady as a friend, Z. I pray for her every night. I pray that, someday, that she might find a good wife. I pray that she might find a church that wants her in it. That they might embrace her and give her the love she deserves. I pray that there are others that think that she is not a “choice” but, created in the image of a Loving God. Z did not choose to be gay. I know because I asked her. She believes that she is the way she was made. I believe her because her honesty is something I do not question. She will tell the truth even if it causes her harm.

God did not create junk. If someone is the way they are, I believe, that was by the intent of God. If someone is LBGT, it is because God had a reason to make them that way. If you believe different so be it. The God I believe in is capable of doing as he wills. The God you believe in much be smaller if you think that He created imperfections and trash. That He could not change things to suit His Will. I do not presume to know His reasons, yet, it is an article of my faith that He had them.

I think it’s time to wind this down. I am not gay but, if you are, know this…

In my mind, it would be against my faith to exclude you. In my mind, God had a reason for making you the way you are. In my mind, the capacity for love is the most important thing. In my mind, being gay is no more a reason to exclude than being straight is a reason to include. God has his reasons and purposes for  making us the way He did. I hope you find a group that will love you for the person you are. I hope that you find a tiny corner of peace and a person to share it with. That’s all I want out of my life. I was given that chance. I pray that Z finds hers, too.

*editorial, this is a tiny bit disjointed. apologies*



  1. So you call God’s laws “legalistic bulls**t” and then pray to Him?

    1 Timothy 1:20 Of whom is Hymenaeus and Alexander; whom I have delivered unto Satan, that they may learn not to blaspheme.

    1. No, I call the people that want to follow the Old Testament rules, followers of “legalistic bulls**t” The New Testament is clear 29 Jesus answered, “The most important is, ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 30 And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ 31 The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” Using the Bible to exclude those that want to follow him because of your views and manipulating what you read to include yourself and exclude someone else is just that. *sigh* You did read the part where I call myself a “Heretic”, right?

      1. Oh right, I forgot, the New Testament is clear.

        You know what else the New Testament is clear on?

        Ephesians 4:31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:

        Ephesians 5:4 Neither filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor jesting, which are not convenient: but rather giving of thanks.

        Colossians 3:8 But now ye also put off all these; anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy communication out of your mouth.

        James 3:10 Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be.

        Calling something “bull****” and claiming to be a Christian?

        Since you reject the OT as being the schoolmaster that exposes our sin and leads us to Christ (Romans 3:20, Galatians 3:24) what do you tell people they need Jesus for? It couldn’t be because they’ve broken God’s laws now could it?

        By the way, the NT condemns sodomy just as much as the OT. (Romans 1:26-27, 1 Timothy 1:8-10, 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, Revelation 21:8)

  2. Interestingly enough, the verses you cite are those I cling to. Those have given me reason to change my life. Those are the reason I am a kinder and gentler person. Perhaps, you should read those and find reasons for compassion.
    I do not presume to judge you, and yet you would question MY faith?
    Sir, this post was an attempt to persuade people to include people. We are going to disagree. The New Testament condones slavery and the ownership of our wives. Do you, also, believe that we should own humans as property? Do you realize that the sin that Sodom and Gomorrah were burned for was the sin of inhospitality. That they were burned for a lack of compassion for the poor and needy. “As I live,” declares the Lord GOD, “Sodom, your sister and her daughters have not done as you and your daughters have done. 49″Behold, this was the guilt of your sister Sodom: she and her daughters had arrogance, abundant food and careless ease, but she did not help the poor and needy.”
    Believe as you wish. Again, we will disagree. It seems to be the condition of Christians to disagree

  3. Thanks for this blog. I am an ordained pastor and I am in a same sex marriage. I am weary of those who beat others over the head with Scripture. There are 7 verses that are pulled out of context and used to bash the LGBTQ community. There are so many more that speak about taking care of the stranger, the widow and the orphan. Society has gotten hung up on sex and have chosen to cling to the same arguments, rather than go out into the world and be salt and light. (IMO)

    I have always wondered what would happen if we quit worrying about what everyone else is doing and focused on what God has called us to do and to be in the world.

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