Some Truths…

There’s a train of thought wandering around and I’m in a quandary as to whether I want to write it or not. It isn’t very P.C. *editorial, out here, I’m not PC*

If you want to refuse to give me service at your business, I’m fine with that. I don’t really care what the reason is. Any will do. Tall, skinny, male, Texan, smartass, blue collar, white, over 50, whatever is cool. You are the one not gaining any income from me. It’s your business to run as you see fit. I also don’t care what you call me, I probably fit the description. I’m not going to get up-in-arms about it. It just doesn’t make me any difference. In the end, my opinion of myself and those of a small handful of loved ones are important to me. Beyond that I don’t really care…

I can not stop you from thinking of Z as “that little dyke bitch”. I can not stop you from saying she’s an “abomination” or that she can not be Christian because she’s a “nasty Lesbian”. She’ll tell you she has a thick skin and doesn’t care. I do. My skin is not so thick. I do care how she’s thought of and treated.

Z is great. I try to talk to her every day. I do because she’s sane and I’m only marginally so. I do because she’s more reasonable than I am. I do because I like her accent. *editorial, non-Texan* I do because she’s a Christian with “Buddhist and Pagan tendencies ” . I do because she’s a Dear Soul that doesn’t want any more than to live her life without having to tell you how to live yours. She’s got a fiery temper. Inside, she’s gentle as a kitten. She’s protective of the people she loves. She loves romance and being wooed. Sometimes, she carries her heart on her sleeve. She’s combative and honest. She’s loyal as all hell. You ALWAYS know where you stand with her. To me, every bit of those are assets. Those are traits I want in a friend.

Part of me wants to say “I give, you win”. You can see what you want to see. You can say you’re protecting your marriage and your kids from her and I can not stop you. You can think that she’s the one that’s being immoral. There’s nothing I can do to change that. You can pretend that you’re defending your “Christian values” from the “War on Christianity”. Dig your bunker and put up lots of sandbags. Get your foil hat and guard your mind from those evil thoughts the “gay agenda” is trying to plant in your head. Save your children and hide them from the impurities that you perceive. That’s your view and your life. Refuse to accept that there’s any reason to change your view. Use Romans 1:26-27 as a weapon and a suit of armour…

Once you’ve done all those things, read this…Romans 2:1-3

“2 Therefore you have no excuse, O man, every one of you who judges. For in passing judgment on another you condemn yourself, because you, the judge, practice the very same things. 2 We know that the judgment of God rightly falls on those who practice such things. 3 Do you suppose, O man—you who judge those who practice such things and yet do them yourself—that you will escape the judgment of God?”

I can not stop you from forming your views. I can not stop you from clinging to your prejudices. Those are for you to hold fast to. Those are your security. Believe as you will. Forget that Jesus, the “Christ” in “Christian” never said anything about focusing on others. He said we were to be concerned with our own lives. Forget that right after the verse you’d use to defend your prejudice is a verse that says you have no right to do that.

As a matter of secular policy, the Constitution that protects your faith, doesn’t say “Christian”. The Amendments that give your rights to equal protection do not state gender or race or orientation. They use the word “citizens”. There is no ambiguity. There are no exceptions. There are merely “citizens”. That’s all.

We, all citizens, have rights. We are all guaranteed to be treated equally by the laws. We have our prejudices. We all have things we do not approve of. We all have our misconceptions and faults. We all are humans. We all have the same basic wants, desires, and needs. We are all equal…


I do not like some of the words and phrases I used. I used them in context. I wish there was a way to not use them. I would protect Z from ever hearing or reading them. I become angry when I see or hear them. She does not deserve them. *sigh* I don’t even like contemplating typing them. I did because they exist. I did and, before I wrote this, I asked her if I could use them. I NEVER want to see her hurt. She is braver than I ever will be…

I don’t know if I write this for anyone else. I think I try. I suppose, in the end, it’s for me and Z. It’s because she deserves a voice, an advocate. It’s because someone should be on her side as a person and not part of a demographic. I am that person that has made a choice to do that. She didn’t choose gay. I did choose to stand up for her.

If you have become offended because I called out your prejudices, so be it. If you want to think you are being attacked by this post, perhaps you are. Perhaps you might consider that you earned it…

One final thought. I wouldn’t change one tiny part of her. To do that would change the greater whole. She is a person, a citizen, that I know, love, and trust.



  1. I hope that one day, someone who holds these prejudices reads your words and thinks hard about what they do. How they make some feel and begin to change how they view people who are different from their own perceived perfect life. Humanity is diverse. Not accepting all the diversity makes for a small uncomfortable world. I wonder if they someone from Germany should deny their German-ness. They had no choice but to be born of their ethnic descent. Not unlike my circumstances.

  2. I do, too. The thing is, like I’ve said both in private and publicly, I like the person you are. I can identify with you, the person. Every part contributes to the whole. I wish people could see that. We both know I’m not gay nor do I have any desire to be. I truly wish that the phrases I used could be un-seen and un-thought. They can not. No matter the circumstances, the person you are is a treasure and having you in my world is my gain. I am glad I un-learned the prejudices I held when I was younger. If I hadn’t, we could not be friends and my world would be far smaller for the lack. People should learn. Sadly, it’s easier to hold a prejudice than it is to let it go. It is easier to dehumanize than it is to change our own views. Those of us that know you, love you and, realize how lucky we are to have the piece of yourself you allow us to have.

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