I wrote a post, some time back, encouraging Z to play with boobies and kiss girls, “I Told Z to Kiss a Girl”. It comes up, in this context because I was talking, as much as a comment section on a blog post can be a conversation, about not being PC…
I’m not PC. I’m just cautious. There is a short list of people I do not want to offend. Z is on that list. I know and want for her to find a girl to have “fun”, read “enjoy being physical”, with. I also want her to find a girl to build a life with. I want a house with yellow roses, a veggie garden, a comfy couch, fireplace, several bedrooms for guests, and a pool. I want a long driveway for walks and a shaded porch for drinks in the afternoon. It needs to have some acres of woods and a pond with a fishing dock…
Physical beauty is fleeting. Sex lasts for a few minutes. Holding hands can last for hours. Peace of mind is for a lifetime.
I’ve said that I don’t care that Z likes girls. That’s not precisely correct. I do care because that’s what’s best for her. I love her the way she is and do not want that to change. Since the “girls” thing is a part of her, I do care. Since my prayers for her include finding love and peace, I must want the right Lady to come along. It’s just that I don’t care that she likes girls any more than I’d care if she liked guys.
Because I’ve written about and for her for more than a year and put some hundreds of hours of thought into these, she, Z, is on my mind a lot. She gets a fairly big portion of my mental energy. That’s fine. If I had a problem with that, I’d cut my losses. I’m quick to get rid of un-needed energy drains. Z isn’t one. Here’s a funny thing. If she were straight and I was single, we wouldn’t work as a couple. She likes crowds and outdoors and high energy. I’m a quiet indoor homebody. Again, that’s fine. *grins* Besides, we’d kill each other… I’m never going to want to be unmarried and she’s never going to want to be straight. Doesn’t change a thing in our relationship. I want the best for her and she for me.
I knew this had a point…If Z were someone else, I’d still want the same things for them. Not the details but, the chance to be left alone to live their life in the fashion that is best for them. She doesn’t deserve to be left in peace because she’s gay. She deserves it because we all do. Having a shot at dignity and peace is basic to being human.
“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness…”
In the end, that’s what we get, “the pursuit of Happiness”. If we are lucky, we get there. If not, we should have a chance to try, no matter if it’s gay or straight, single or married, without being hindered by the forms and conventions of anyone else.
So, yeah, maybe I do care if Z likes girls. Maybe I’ve not been right all along. It is what fits her. It is what is the best way for her to pursue “Happiness”. What I want is the best for a friend that I love…
*Disclaimer. I never use that thought to include criminal acts. That idea and justification is never going to be in here*